Imagine this: you’re relaxing on a serene beach with your friend. The water is crystal clear, the sand a powdery white and the sky the perfect shade of blue. You’re on cloud nine and super excited because you’re just about to share some exciting news with her. You turn to her and say:

“I’m embarking on a new adventure as a transformational life coach!”

It’s an empowering moment because you haven’t shared this amazing news with anyone. But she turns to you like you’re crazy and says:

“How the f*&* are you going to be a life coach when parts of YOUR life are all f*&*ed up?!!”

And yes, word-for-word, that is EXACTLY what one of my best friends said to me!

But instead of getting all righteous on her, I took a step back and was like ‘Damn, thank you for being so real’. Because that’s what great friends do - be straight up with you. So I replied:

“That’s a great question! Let me think about it and get back to you.”

And then we both laughed our asses off!!!

Mulling it over

That night I did think about it. The next day, when we were back on the beach with drinks in hand, I told her that as a coach I was going to help people by teaching them how to:

  • set boundaries

  • love themselves

  • build their self-worth and

  • be resilient in the face of ugliness

precisely because … I’ve been there!

Some of the best teachers in life are those who’ve experienced struggles, darkness, and messiness in their lives. They know what it feels like so they can effectively model how to create opportunities out of chaos, andhow to re-frame dysfunction as a stepping stone and life lesson.

Embrace your messy

Our messy and our dysfunction are part of life and play a key role in allowing us to connect with others in a real and raw way. I know my challenges, my experiences and my imperfections help me help others who are in the same situation. They also give me compassion for their pain.

So I say: shift your mindset and embrace your messy! Not only will you find a lesson in your messy, it will also teach you to appreciate the simple things in life - your favorite song, taking a stroll under the summer sun, or laughing with a friend till your belly hurts.

Friends, lean into your messy and thank it for making you who you are today. While you might keep struggling, don’t allow that to silence your voice. Your story matters. You never know what sharing it might mean to other person. Go ahead and turn your messy into a masterpiece.