Aside from Dare to Achieve, I also run a successful staffing agency. One of the questions on our employment application is “What is your greatest motivation in life?”. The answer is almost always - my family and friends. It’s rare for some to write money, work or material things.
While family and friends are the most important thing to us, those relationships can also be the most challenging. Perhaps it’s because of our tendency to focus on the 20% negative qualities in a person, rather than the 80% positive?
The other aspect of our significant others is: they’re not in our lives by accident. They teach us lessons the universe wants us to learn. Maybe it’s to be more patient, forgiving, understanding, kind, loving, engaged, focused, present etc. And until we learn the lesson intended for us, we will continue to be faced with the same challenges (remember our last blog post???)
Flipping your focus
Nothing is more important than fueling the souls of the people around you, especially your loved ones. If you want your relationships to thrive, you must invest in them. Be generous with your positive words and compliments on a daily basis – and bite back the negative ones.
Strive to make the lives of the people around you better by encouraging them, building them up, and helping them feel better about themselves. Words hold immense power; they can either bring out confidence and self-worth, or cut like a knife and bring out sadness and feelings of hopelessness.
The famous saying ‘You get more bees with honey than vinegar’ rings so true here. For the most part, if you’re kind to others you will usually get the response you want. If you are sour, you usually get the opposite.
Shhh….A little secret
You first have to give before you can receive. You want love, give it. You want respect, give it. You want appreciation … you get the gist! And an extra little secret – be the most loving to those who challenge you the most. You’ll be surprised the lesson it teaches you …
You might ask why go to all of this effort? Because, my dear friends:
Relationships are where we go to sculpt the soul and to magnify the human experience
And remember: we all have the same needs - to be loved, valued, and respected.